Wiley Wallaby Huckleberry Soft Licorice

 I grew up in Idaho and a family tradition when I was younger was to romp around the mountains in late July and pick enough huckleberries to fill an ice cream bucket so we could at least make a pie, some syrup, maybe some jam. 

I didn't much care for it as a little, little kid. I couldn't figure out why anyone would want to eat them straight off the bushes because 1) fresh fruits and 2) you never fill up your bucket that way. I may have been a picky eater and fresh fruits were not my cup of tea. Neither was a cup of tea, but I digress.

But in my teenage years, I realized that even in Idaho, not everyone was as mountainsy as my family and that huckleberries were not only a part of family tradition, they were part of my identity. And so I began to live anything huckleberry.

So when I saw these Australian licorice purporting to be huckleberry, I said ,"I'll be the judge of that!" And they took my money.

I associate huckleberries with cool mountains. And I associate Australia with desert, so, not mountains. I am skeptical from the beginning that these guys can get it right. My first impression was, "Wow, these licorice bites are huge".  These are not Nibs, people!

These are like the size of my thumb. That is, if my thumb got stung by a bee and swelled up. Ok, so maybe they are just the size of my regular thumb, but I have fat stubby thumbs, so they seemed big. My thumbs are not bite size. I would not eat my thumb in one bite. No I'll be honest, the package does not say "bite size" but these are not ropes, so what other licorice is there? Chunks? Maybe this is how Australians eat their licorice, I don't know. Clearly I've never been to Australia. And the one Australian person that I know has moved, so I can't ask him. Whatever. We will henceforth call these "chunks"

My second impression after I actually took a bite was, "ok, so maybe these are bite size, I just stuffed the whole thing in my mouth" maybe my thumbs aren't that big after all.  

(Check it out, actual size)

Ok, so getting to flavor, which was my original skepticism, it's ok. If someone were to hand me these and ask what flavor they were, huckleberry would not be at the top of my list. Mediocreberry would. Seriously, these don't even taste like blueberry, which is what most people think of when they eat huckleberry. If I could describe to the uninitiated what the difference is between blueberry and huckleberry in a non-flavor way, I would say blueberries taste like mildly tart blue powdery fruit, especially if you left them in the fridge too long.  They taste a little depressing, which I imagine is why they are called blueberries, because let's face it, anything you make with blueberry turns purple. If they were really named after a color and not depression, they would be purpleberries. Huckleberries, on the other hand, taste like blueberries that are happy. And I know that, because I have actually had blueberries on one hand and huckleberries on the other, and it was literally the other hand that was the happy one. They have a little extra, brighter tart to them and a little mountain flavor. If they could talk, they would say, "Wow, what a day to be alive! It's 5a.m., time to ascend the summit because nothing beats sunrise on a mountain peak." 

Aren't you glad huckleberries can't talk?

Anyway, I let three of my kids try these, because we were on a road trip and they ate all the gummy frogs that I bought for them, their responses were, "Meh", "Grape?", and "Dose are not vewy gud"

Funny.  The 3yr old was the most articulate.

Though to be fair, if the options were red licorice, black licorice or huckleberry, this is your best option. And that's coming from someone who likes black licorice. The "soft and chewy" is good, they nailed that, and really, if I'm being honest, they flavor is pleasant. It's not in your face huckleberry, but it's pleasant.

I did eat what was left of these late one night. (Don't judge me). And I will say that there was a lingering aftertaste of huckleberry. Like as if it was calling from a distance, or simply the ghost of huckleberries past. I think this is a character flaw of licorice and not necessarily the flavor. I met a sales guy once that worked for Hershey and he said that if you tried Twizzlers the day they were made, you'd be in heaven, but they don't hold onto their flavor very well. He said they actually over flavor them so that they taste like something other than wheat glue by the time they get to you. (I'm paraphrasing, he didn't say "wheat glue") So I imagine a similar effect is happening here. Sorry licorice, you're just so... so... non committal.

Now, I need to address another, unrelated grievance. With a name like "Wiley Wallaby" and the fact that these are soft licorice, one would assume these are Australian. You know what happens when you assume?

That's right, flip these over and, Bam!

"Made in the US Star", which is not - I might remind you - "The United States of Australia". I guess that's where the "Wiley" comes in, as in "Hah, we had you fooled into thinking these were made in the United States of Australia!"

I am glad that these guys are a proud partner of the pinyswear foundation. I'm too lazy to look up what that foundation does or how it relates to licorice, but I'm sure that if it's important enough to put on their back panel, it must be a good cause. Remember that next time you pinky swear something. There's a foundation for that.

So, to summarize for anyone that just scrolled through my ramblings and didn't actually read:

These are soft and tasty, though if you're a die hard huckleberry fan, you'll likely be disappointed.

Delicious rating: 8/10

Softness rating: 9/10

Huckleberry rating: 3/10

Australian imposter rating: 10/10

Buy it again?: Depends on what else is on the shelf, 5/10